i miss you :(

will be going back to rembau tomorrow.

i miss my mum already.

mum is my everything.

cepatla esok.

nk balik rmh, nk spend time dgn adik2.

nk lupakn mslh skejap.

and maybe i'll stop blogging for a while.

mlslah, ape yg ditulis org nk kecoh2.

lecehla mcm nie.

sudahh. merajuk aku.

damn u stalkers.

hai.

name sy Nik Siti Hajar Aisyah bt Nik Abdullah.

to be short, Jaja Aisyah.

ada ape2 lg yg boleh sy tlg??

arghhh. stress.

sayang, blog ini adalah tempat utk sy mluahkn ape yg sy rase.

sy xsuka tulis diari, leceh.

tp tak smua la sy tulis kt sini,

there are certain things that i need to keep by myself.

ahhh, mlsla nk ckp ape point sy sbnrnye kt post nie.

penat sgt, slalu gduh dgn dia. kne marah.

ape je yg sy tulis mst akn disampaikn kt dia.

makanye slepas itu, sy pun dimarahi.

mmg 'seronok' sgt bila kne mrh, esp dr org yg kita syg.

baguslahh. teruskan usaha anda utk menyampaikn lg ye. lol.

goshh.

perasaan ingin memiliki dia begitu kuat sekali.

benci. aku tak suka.

aku tak mau kalah pada perasaan aku sendiri.

what should i do??

:((

woot woot ;D

sudah ada pengganti???

biarlah rahsiaaa.

dia. him. MII.

tak kira la brape ramai org skalipun nk bgtau aku perangai buruk dia, kejahatan dia.

crita jela ape yg kau nk crita.

all about him, past and present.

i will still love him like before, and it's not reducing at all.

kerana apa??

krana smua org ada keburukan msg2, tiada siapa yg sempurna sayang.

aku juga tidakla baik sgt.

i'm still learning to be good.

disebalik kejahatan dan keburukan dia itu, ada terselit kebaikan yg org lain tak ada pun.

dia mahu aku berubah, dia sendiri sdg cuba utk berubah.

w'pun 'kuasa' dia tidaklah terlalu kuat,

tetapi sedikit sbyk dia telah bwt aku sedar.

the last time we met, sempat dia b'pesan dkt aku.

tersenyum aku seketika, mungkin dia tau kdg2 aku lupa utk sujud kepada-Nya.

mungkin dia tau aku leka.

mmgla smue org bleh ckp mcm tu, tp aku tahu niat dia.

thank you :)

how i wish i'm in deep inside his heart right now.

sorry :(

apabila aku tidak puas hati,

dan pabila apa aku tidak dpt ape yg aku inginkan,

aku memberontak, aku jd degil,

org lain pula yg jd mangsa.

maafkn diriku.

kerana berperangai begini.

ianye terjadi apabila aku rase insecure yg teramat sgt.

payah utk aku melepaskn ape yg aku hampir miliki.

payah utk aku melupakn ape yg telah terjadi.

sepatutnya aku jadikan itu sbg pengajaran, tetapi tidak.

aku tetap berdegil.

ya Tuhan...

temukanlah aku dgn org yg m'punyai 'kuasa' kuat utk berdepan dgn perangaiku ini.

agar dia dpt mengubah diriku.

kerana aku sendiri tidak mampu utk mengubah diriku lagi.

hati ini

sumpah, i miss u badly :'(

bila kepala sudah ting tong

* akibat tidak tido satu mlm, ini sebahagian dr activity utk bukak mata ye adik2. ;)

aku mmg sgt penyabar

dear lily,

papa kamu mmg suka cabar ksabaran mama skrg.

pk sabar dia je.

eughhh.

penat. sakit. sedih.

it has been 2 days since i made the decision for not keeping in touch with him.

and i've been suffering a lot for these 2 days.

i'm doing it because for our own good.

no, for his own good actually.

lots of things happen lately,

and i shall say that i'm giving up already.

it's very tough to win his heart, seriously.

i know i'm not good enough.

and i know he's not for me.

for now, i'm trying to put him away of my mind.

eventhough deep inside, i miss him badly. :((

i miss to hear his voice.

i miss to look at his face.

i miss to hear his laugh.

i miss everything about u MII :'(

menyesal

just had a very hard time.
i just cant believe that i had to get through that kind of situation.
thank you for those people who are still being by my side.
aimi, nana, meyna. i love you.
and thank you to him too, for being there with me.
i know u wont disappoint me, i know.
thank you.
i promise, i wont do it again.
promise!

kita 1 malaysia maa!

salam

last night, i mean the saturday night. me and kak aina went to i-city around at 10.30 pm after we had our dinner at amin thai. i was so excited to go until i didn't care to drive in a very massive traffic jam because of the chap goh meh celebration there. that place was soooo crowded by people from shah alam and maybe there were any from other cities. the best part is, not only chinese people went to celebrate it. there were also malays and indians or maybe some indonesians, nepalians or philippinians perhaps?? ape benda aku mengarut nie?? neway, it really shows that we live in a multicultural country and we can celebrate the festivals together aite?? that's the spirit of one Malaysia. dont u think it's sweet? erkk.

ok. whatever it is, it was a wonderful night. people come and go. they brought along their digital cameras and SLRs. me?? only brought my Nokia X3 3.2 mp camera. huhu. it's such a beautiful place. i had been wanting to go there since before the midterm break. refer to my previous post. but the situation was different. someone was not there with us. he promised to bring me there, but since he was with his friends at that time, only me and kak aina then. nemind, i still could enjoy my night with kak aina eventhough it was a lil bit sad as he was not next to me when we watched the fireworks. enough jaja.

ran away with aimi and nana to kampung baru after that. they picked me up at section 7. kak aina had to drive her car alone. sorry sis. huhu. so, me with the girlfriends had our supper at chop and steak kg.baru, KL. safely arrived in Shah Alam almost 3 am i guess. ok. i repeat,SAFELY. because aimi had turned Jonet into a KLIA express train. ehh no, faster than the train i think. phewwww. huhuhu.

at amin thai

try to spot me people