the challenge in Ramadhan

last night,i had a lil bit fever..i could feel that my body's temparature was getting high..and i'm having bad sore throat and cough since last week..i had thought that if i wake up this morning and the temparature is quite high,i'll go to PK..i was supposed to cook for berbuka yesterday,but finally kak quelen ended up to cook because i was really2 not feeling well..and today after i woke up for sahur,my body's temparature is getting back to normal..alhamdulillah..i'm afraid if the fever is still there,bcoz dah cukup syarat da for the H1N1 symptoms..yes it's Ramadhan now,and this is one of His challenge just to see how patient i am to get through this..so do the separation between me n him,it is a fact that i have to face esp in Ramadhan..i am so touched when many of my friends support and give me courage to be strong in facing it..i love u people!thank u so much..i really appreciate it..mwa mwa!

i can do it!

things to do:

1. will be trying to delete all his messages and pictures so that i can forget that stupid guy..

2. will be putting lily far far away from me so that i won't remember her 'papa'..

3. will be throwing away his tshirt so that i won't sleep with that thing,the bottle which has our names on it and anything that has to do with him!!!

4. kill him!(tp xbleh sbb berdosa la plak)

wish me luck,tq

i really hate when he said "there's no point for us to be together"

i'm dying here,

jaja aisyah

5.30 pm

i love u stupid! i love u.....................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i love u!

i love u!

i love u!

i love u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

='(

today

when i woke up this morning,i really2 thought that it was just a bad dream..but when i had fully woke up,i remembered that i just lost someone whom i love very much..i took my bath,and i was late already for the class in kenanga..around 8.30 am,i drove to shah alam..ouh btw,i'm at pj now..went back here last nite..

arrived at kenanga around 9 am..fuhh!sharply..juz rite after i sit,mr.rosdin arrived..been waiting for the others..aimi came in..i sit next to her,and told her what happened..she was shocked..i said to her..maybe it will take time for me to fall in love again..

me; mi..i nk dia..but i know syg nie xbleh nk pakse2..:(

aimi; i know..for the time being,i rase u kne rehat dlu la..

me; tau..

really need some places to go..alone..i juz want to get some peace and cheer up myself back..i want to look strong in front of people..i'm so afraid to fall in love again..i dont think i'll be ready to have someone new in my life..no,i dont think so..enough is enough..let me spend all my quality time with my friends and family..to my friends and family,i'm all yours!i've no other commitment to give to..

..............

finally,he has made his decision..aku cuba utk terima kputusan dia..though it's so painful now..i have to let him go,because love cannot be forced..kebahagiaan dia lg penting dr kebahagiaan diri aku sendiri..biar aku yg terseksa,n dia gembira..since before,always told myself that my happiness is when the person whom i love most is happy though he's not with me..dear..i gave u the chance to choose..and u choose to be free..far away from my miserable life..thanks..u've made the best one..

btw,

happy 7th month relationship dear..i love u..

never had such worse allergy before..

yesterday was a bad day for me..ku xpenah mengalami allergy sebegitu before this..that night mmg badan dh rase gatal semacam.. still tried to get sleep..but aku asyik terjage je because xthn kegatalan yg melampau..around 4.30 am,i woke up and switched on the lamp..tgk kaki aku,and i was like..OMG!what is this crap??!!it's like almost all part of my legs jd merah2 and bengkak2..mcm kesan kne gigit kt nyamuk but that one lg besar ah!kt bdn pn mcm merah2 gak..that time,bwt2 ok lg rub some minyak angin and got back to sleep..pg tu terjage,tgk kaki aku mkin teruk and kejutkn kak quelen..dia trus terbgn tgk kaki aku yg sgt buruk time tu mcm ada byk unwanted benjol2 yg tah ape2..

kak quelen accompanied me to PK,and we skipped the morning class..dia pn nk check dia punye BP because lately she's not well..thanks to nana for lending me her car,if tak xtaula mesti aku duk tergaru je naik bas..smpai je kt PK,agk rmai ah org kt situ..pg2 je dh rmai org sakit..i waited for my turn and at the same time agk tkut because tgk org disekeliling pkai mask and coughed a lot..krg xpsl2 aku plak yg b'jangkit..msuk je bilik doktor,i told him about what happened and showed him my leg (terpakse) and he said it is an allergy..bleh jd allergy because of the water,dusk or from the food..

time tghari tu,allergy aku mkin truk smpai naik kt bdn n leher..since i have the mc letter,kak quelen sruh aku stay kt rmh je nnti tkut dlm class aku duk garu2 plak sbb cuaca agk pnas..so,i decided to skip the afternoon class too..seksa ouh..tgn asyik duk garu sane sini..aku telan ubat yg doktor bg,agk mengantuk ubat tu n trus tido..so for today,alhamdulillah ada kurgla ckit tp kesan merah2 tu ada lg..haihhhhhh...

* currently,i'm updating my private blog too..

shoot!

it has been 2 days aku mengalami sakit kaki yg teruk..i'm having difficulties to walk,esp to walk up the stairs..akibat dari practice aerobik utk SAF..will be representing my faculty for the final this sunday..sgt sakit,nk tido pn susah..luckily kak aneez gave me satu cream utk tahan sakit last nite,nyenyak gak aku tido..we have to practice everyday,i cant imagine me myself in next 5 days..paralyze maybe??hahaa ;D akibat sudah tidak lame work out mcm nie..adeh..seksa..

hey busyuk!

i love u megat mahathir. too much. we were talking so happily last night, and i enjoyed every single moment i talked with u. sampaikn i bleh ckp plak time nk letak phone tu, "nice talking to u..", mcm kite bru knal plak. hahaa. dahla u suka menyakat, sabar jela. those 5 conditons, will do! pomish! cepat balik sini tau, if nk mkn spaghetti yg i masak. i miss u pop corn. mish u a lot. ;)